On a lovely afternoon.

Lately I've been in a bit of a funk. I am not completely sure of how I got there, but suffice to say it has been mildly irritating. Last night though, I finally broke down and had a good, long cry. It always amazes me, how good I feel after I've let go and let myself cry it all out. That probably sounds odd, but it is absolutely true. I am one of those people who bottles their emotions, without even realizing it sometimes, and it always magnifies the feelings later. Magnified feelings = not so great.

But I am happy to state that the funk is gone. Score one for me! I had the loveliest afternoon today. Husband and I spent it in the park, celebrating a close friend's birthday. All that crying must have done some good, because it was wonderful and relaxed. Sometimes I feel like I forget to live in the moment. I love to be in control of everything, especially my emotions, and I will be the first to say that I have the hardest time relinquishing that control. Nick usually has to pry the control out of my fingers, because I totally have my emotions in a death grip. But that's one of the things that I am working on with my Happiness Project.

Speaking of the Happiness Project, I haven't mentioned it in a while. Or my progress for that matter. Needless to say that I have been quite bad about holding myself accountable. I'm working on that too, as you can imagine. It is a very long list and it takes time. But, I do want to share something small. This is just something that I've been taking the time to incorporate into my daily routine, simply because I take pleasure from it.

I love to sing, always have and probably always will. I sang for Nick at our wedding, because I know that he loves when I sing and to say thank you for loving me. It was a little present from me to him. Now, whenever the mood strikes me (and I'm not in public), I whip out my phone and shuffle through a playlist of songs that I love to sing to. It never fails to fill me up with happiness. And the things is, the songs don't have to be entirely upbeat or happy themselves. I am a sucker for lovely lyrics and sometimes, lovely lyrics come in the form of more somber songs. Here is what I've been listening to lately.

What have you been listening to lately? Please do share! I love to discover new music that I can play endlessly, annoying everyone in my household, including the kitten. Just kidding, sort of.

And then I changed my name.

I'm married. Wow, still getting used to saying that. It isn't that it sounds odd, but I've been waiting and dreaming about it for so long that it seems unreal at times. Unreal in the way that I finally get to say, I married the love of my life and hey, "this is my husband." Yeah, I'm having a moment here.

Yesterday I drove all around town, to various government buildings, in order to file the paperwork that's necessary when you want to legally change your last name. I began my morning in the probate courts, where you can not only request a copy of your marriage license, but a firearms license as well. Interesting how those two windows are right next to each other. Nick and I both found that amusing. Anyways, I paid for two official copies of our marriage license, the second being out of paranoia of losing the first. The lady handed me two very official looking documents that she happened to notarize right in front of me with her little magic notary device. It would have been magical if I hadn't walked through a security checkpoint and seen a smile somewhere along the way. From the probate courts, I paid a visit to my local social security office. The people there were oddly friendly, and within the hour, I had my receipt stating that I was now a Mrs. After the social security office, I decided that I might as well just go ahead and drop by the local DMV offices. Bad plan, very bad plan. Not only did I think that I was going to die there waiting in line, I took the world's worst photo for my new license. Seriously. Let's just say that I will be going back, paying the small fee of $15 or $25, and retaking the photo when I don't look like a hobo. Otherwise, I will be forced to hide my license (out of shame) for the next ten years. That's a long time.

I suppose the thing that surprised me the most about my whole journey, was that the process was not as hard as I feared it would be. Actually, with all things considered, it was virtually painless. Each time I walked into a different office, all I wanted to do was to tell everyone (and their mother) that I married the most amazing man on the planet. It's just something that I thought everyone should know, because I am so unbelievably proud to call Nick my husband. And it's odd that our relationship could deepen even more after our wedding, especially since it was so wonderful beforehand, but it has. Being tied to the person you love the most, legally speaking, has an effect on your relationship. I love him more with every passing moment and know that my love will continue to deepen with every day, month, and year that passes.

At some point, I will have some wedding photos to share with you all. Our photographers said that it usually takes about 2 or 3 weeks to process through everything, but I'm hoping I hear from them sooner rather than later. I am literally bouncing in my chair with anticipation.

SIDE NOTE: As a side note, I would like to draw some attention to the little badge sitting in my sidebar, on the right-hand side of the screen. (look to your right, below the blurb about me). I recently submitted a design for the annual Minted T-Shirt Challenge and would love for you to go vote. Of course, I would love you to vote for me, but please pick YOUR actual favorite. May the odds be forever in the best designers favor, as we might say if we actually lived in the world of the Hunger Games. Can you tell that I am excited to see the film?

Savoring those little moments.

Yesterday was a bit rough. I still wasn't feeling well and that meant I was not able to be as productive as I would have liked. Today I feel better, happier and even more motivated to finish a couple of the tasks I began before I started to feel sick. For instance, this morning I plan to finish tackling the guest room filled with all of my useless crap. Seriously, there are plastic containers in there just filled with things that I will never use. So, I will finish going through each container and make a donation pile. Nick is going to have to help me with the donation though. There's a lot to donate. But I'm feeling very good about it.

Last night was a little rough, but Nick and I managed to finish a few more wedding tasks and were able to cross them off our to-do list. That made the day seem a little better. And I tell you what, crossing items off a to-do list can be oh-so satisfying. Furthermore, I am pleased to announce that we have officially booked our honeymoon to Asheville. I may have talked about this before, but we decided to visit a place that was special to us, since we are on a tight budget for the wedding. I'm quite excited about going back to Asheville. We will get to visit our favorite spots and hopefully discover a little more this time. It isn't a luscious, tropical vacation like most honeymoons usually are, but after we've saved some money, we will do plan to go somewhere more tropical. It was our compromise for the time being and a good one at that.

So, I talked about my adventures in the bookstore in my last few posts and I have confession to make. Well, a confession of sorts. I am a sucker for journals and notebooks. Who isn't though? They are just so lovely and inviting, just waiting for you to fill their blank pages with words of wisdom and special moments. Ok, I'm exaggerating a bit. As usual though, I browsed the selection at the bookstore, where the best ones seem to be these days, and came across a journal about gratitude. It's one of those daily journals with prompts (total suck for prompts, right here). It intrigued me, so I picked it up and read through a few of them. The prompts weren't mind-blowing or earth-shattering, but there was something to the idea of expressing what you are grateful for each day. It makes you reflect on your day and the good moments. For instance, the last one I reflected on was about savoring the little moments in your day. Those few extra moments you spend in the shower, sipping your coffee a little more slowly, or lingering in the car to finish singing along with one of your favorite songs (which I do a lot). Needless to say, I bought the journal. Each night I've tried to make a habit of writing in it. It seems to calm me down and let me release the bad moments from my day, in addition to relieving a little stress about tasks that still need to be done. I mention the journal and the prompts because you will most likely hear about them in the future. I'm bound to want to share all of the really good ones with all of you.

I've been reading a little slowly, I admit it. I tend to read about a chapter a day from the Happiness Project, not because I can't read more than that, but I like to really reflect upon each discovery that Gretchen makes. Yesterday was about the novelty of a new activity or purchase, as well as happiness as it relates to work. In order to feel happier, some of us feel the need to buy things. This seems to help in the short-term, but long-term it only makes you feel worse. I mean you are left with less money, a pile of things you didn't actually need, and a soon-to-be-spouse who is less than thrilled about the bedspread you picked out. I've experienced this first hand and it's one of the reasons that I've chosen to de-clutter my life and hold myself more accountable for the things that I purchase. It makes me reflect on the things that I would really want to have (mostly books, food or new music), especially since Nick and I are on a tight budget as soon-to-be newlyweds. I ask myself, "do I really need this?" It doesn't always work as well as I intend for it to, but it does help. Determining what you value most seems to be a recurring theme for my happiness project. Does that mean I've reached a truth, much like Gretchen did in the second chapter? I'm not sure, but the novelty of this project hasn't worn off yet and actually seems to be working, even though I've only just begun.

Work. Hmm, how do I approach this subject? It's a tough one for me because I don't currently have a full-time job. Gretchen talks about the importance of loving what you do and the idea of personal or professional growth. We love to tackle challenges and get upset when we become complacent in a job. She thinks this stems from the fact that we are no longer growing when we become comfortable. I don't know about you, but I do love to be challenged. But I kind of wish that she had applied this in the broader sense, because I believe this applies to the unemployed as well. I am thrilled to be able to spend my time as I see fit during the day, but at the same time I miss having a daily routine or regimen, which often comes with having a job. So it's like being caught in this little whirlpool of not knowing how to feel. I've applied for so many jobs that I've lost count at this point. I have also had a few interviews, but none of them have resulted in an actual job. That's a daunting and depressing realization right there. Just last night, I found out that I wasn't selected for a job that I really wanted. It was disheartening to say the least. I was over-qualified for the position, which I was aware of, and the employer thought I would leave after just a short period of time. It's not what I would have done, but I understand the employer not wanting to take that risk, not really knowing me very well. It forced me to dust my shoulders off and begin the search once more. Just one more task that needs to be done, but I'm hoping I find the right job when the time comes. This could simply be a lesson in not settling.